"be careful; better not expose yourself"
Benjamin Kissell
What makes this Gay Heart stagger, then Weep tears of sheer frustrated exasperation at the madding crowd? Why, it’s another example of biased, closed-minded individuals attempting to use the system of open equality to deny said equality to others.
Recently, kick-ass author (always fun Twitter tweeter) and awesome vocalist on rights-abused Kelly Barnhill (The Mostly True Stories of Jack, Iron Hearted Violet) posted about a “proposition” brought before the school board at Anoka Hennepin, Minnesota. Yeah, proposition - it's a list of demands.
Initially reported by the Twin Cities Daily Planet newspaper [here], I couldn’t help but share Kelly’s outrage at this abuse of the openness schools have finally come to. In an era of increased awareness of the effects of bullying, this is just plain sad.
Let me preface my argument here: Obviously, I am gay.
I am not a Christian – I was raised Presbyterian, but, in my early 20s I came to Judaism. I comport myself as a member of the “Reform” branch of Judaism [my best friend and I jokingly call me Jew-ish]. I believe in faith; I feel everyone ought to have that inalienable right to their beliefs (from Orthodox Christianity to Islam, from Buddhist to Wiccan, from Deist to Atheist [and from Justin to Kelly]). It is not my place to judge the veracity of others’ beliefs the way I judge their outfits and hairstyles.
That being said, I think this group, the “Parents Action League”, is a bunch of self-righteous, unmitigated assclaps [and you can quote me on that].
I could tackle this article two ways: 1) I could pick one or two key points and expound upon them or 2) I could go all MST3K [Mystery Science Theater 3000 for non-geeks] on their asses … hrmmm, decisions decisions.
[Like anyone thought I’d miss a chance to riff on bigots?]
What follows is an excerpt of their proposals/demands brought forth (like some latter-day 10 Commandments of bigotry). My color-commentary and snarky commentary follow in italics.
1. A new division within the student support services and a special section on the District 11 website devoted to student of fiath, moral conviction, ex-homosexuals and ex-transgenders.
Okay, I had to look up "ex-transgenders" here. I mean, how does one become an "ex-transgeder"? Does this involve layering the former gender on top of the transformed gender? Like a triple-sundae? Boy to girl to slightly girly-bits boy? It sounds really confusing and expensive.
Of course, it's really just another evangelical shite-line that they try to sell to confused and pained transgendered folk of faith: you can pray the pain/confusion/sexual identity away. Right.
2. A listening tour by Superintendent Denny Carlson and district prevention coordinator Barry Scanlon with students of faith, moral conviction, ex-homosexuals, and ex-transgenders.
Again with the exes - I don't know about you, but I prefer my exes to be kept either in isolation or at least as far away from me as the restraining orders allow.
Yes, listening is good. And letting the students voice concerns is a GREAT thing - open and honest are good keywords here. But, again, the whole open and honest possibility when someone is cloaking their bigotry behind religion? Not really the right tack.
Also? Anyone else notice the wording there - "moral conviction"? So, by being GLBT one cannot have morals or honor? Thanks for the closed mind there, buddies.
3. That District 11 administrators and staff work closely with pro-family and ex-homosexual and ex-transgender organizations to provide ongoing training to school counselors, school nurses, social workers, school psychologists, prevention specialists, student learning advocates and a number of secondary principals and principals.
Wow, that sounds very endearing. Let's all work in harmony. Happiness; unicorns; fluffy bunnies; lollipops and rainbows. Oh, wait. Rainbows are gay. And positive. We CANNOT have that. Let's knock the sense outta that right here, right now.
Also? As if the school system isn't already taxed to within an inch of its life with the endless programs upon our teachers and such. The spare time to do this comes from where? It's not like we want the students to go to school to learn applicable lessons at any point, right? #TOTALassclapFAIL
4. Provide professional development opportunities in which philosophical, pedogogical, and political assumptions of GLBT advocacy are critically examined.
ASSUMPTIONS OF GLBT ADVOCACY ARE CRITICALLY EXAMINED?!?! Say WHAA-AAT?! Are you fucking kidding me? The question of legal rights within our own nation are questioned enough as-is, you're gonna teach the next generation to go even further?
Listen you insane fuckwits [pardon my French] I think it's time you and my taser met ... you know, for a philosophical and pedogogical discussion of my rights as an American citizen.
5. Provide webinars, seminars for all staff on over-coming sexual disorders.
And, lest we assume they mean actual disorders here - they mean only GLBT related sexuality as their sexual disorders.
When a straight man rapes a 12 yr old little girl, well, that's just kosher, eh?
6. Provide training on bullying and suicide that protects all students.
Okay, for the first time I can't quite say something mean here. Oh, wait - they cited the "It Gets Better" videos as "vulgar". Yepp, let's REALLY chat about better training on bullying and suicide that protects all students ... (in fine print: well, the students "we" approve of).
Or do they mean to provide training on how to BETTER bully and increase suicide? If so, it sounds like they're right on track there to me.
7. Provide the history of gay-related immune deficiencies and acquired immune deficiencies and the medical consequences of homosexual acts.
SAY WHAT? Gay-related immune deficienc-say whaaaaaaaaat?! Okay, so, the entire HIV/AIDS epidemic which affects equally homosexual and heterosexual persons is all a lie?
Wow.
Thank you. I'll make sure to tell my friend Susan - a heterosexual woman, aged 34, causcasian, that she's not really carrying a time-bomb in her bloodstream. I mean, it's only a gay-person's disease, right?
Nope.
Y'know, for crying in the kitchen sink, I thought we got past this ridiculous mindset when Nancy Reagan left office.
8. That all health classes that address homosexuality be required to provide up-to-date information from the CDC on sexually transmitted diseases and HIV among the groups the CDC designates as men who have sex with men.
Yes, because heterosexual sex NEVER leads to STDs; gross infections and such.
Or teen pregnancy.
Or more closed-minded-bigots.
Say it with me, everyone: Assclaps.
9. Provide the following pro-family, ex-homosexual, ex-transgender information and websites to all counselors, school psychologistsclassroom teachers [the list was submitted to the board and not spoken at the meeting]
I'll concede - equal rights applies to all. The information should be available ... no matter how pinheaded and idiotic it is.
10. Provide pro-family, ex-homosexual and ex-transgender videos to secondary media centers.
Sure, provide them. Just because you provide them doesn't mean anyone needs to watch them.
...................................................
Worst part? I had hoped that this was just one of those standard Right-Wing Conservative Nutjob moments - unfortunately, one of the religous folk presenting this shite was a Rabbi. Let's all gang-up on the gays.
Yes, totes.
After all, aside from Juden, no one else were heavy targets for Hitler's cleansing. Well, except for Gyspies [I have Romani blood] and homosexuals [I don't practice, I am expert]. Shouldn't minorities targeted by bigoted religious zealots stick together?
Let's get together in harmony, NoH8, and smack a bigot.
(with our words)
